Don’t be what? Don’t be busy all the time.
“I’m just so busy”
“There are not enough hours in the day”
“I’m exhausted, it’s non-stop…”
Recognise any of these statements? Are you someone who is constantly talking about how busy they are? Do you have a friend that is always “so busy, so stressed from being so busy?”
To a certain extent, we are ALL busy and depending on our definition of busy, some more than others. Some people like to tell you, constantly, how busy they are. Some rush around showing you how busy they are.
Do you enjoy being busy?
Some people thrive on it but in my experience, on the whole, most people claim that they don’t enjoy it, that it leaves them feeling worn out, stressed, overwhelmed. So why do we make ourselves or allow ourselves to be so busy?
What do you gain from telling people how busy you are?
Sometimes it’s because people need to find reasons for not doing other things. Maybe they forgot a birthday or haven’t been in contact for a long time – it’s easier to say it’s because they’ve been SO busy.
Others are convincing themselves that they are being productive because they are filling up every hour of every day with something.
If you think back to my last blog, it might be a label that you have worn for such a long time that you assume that everyone expects you to be busy, to be leading a hectic life.
Do you need to be so busy?
In coaching sessions with busy clients, we look at their week and what is keeping them so busy. For some, it’s the desire to provide their children with endless activities which often don’t really suit the rest of the family.
Others recognise that they are not using their downtime wisely – endless scrolling eats up valuable time and then they are cramming other tasks into a smaller space and not leaving space for the good stuff.
Over committing.
We can all be guilty of this. Saying yes to things that we then need to find space for in the diary when actually we have been really ‘busy’ for the last few weeks/months and could do with some less busy time.
It’s not always possible to space things out to be less busy BUT what we can do is be aware that some if this is of our own doing. It’s a choice we are making to be busy.
Maybe consider the following.
- Children do not need to be occupied 24/7 dealing with boredom is a valuable skill to learn. Ask yourself, “do they need to attend quite so many clubs or activities?”
- Keep an eye on the diary. Once a month have a free weekend – a weekend without plans that allows you to be spontaneous OR rest.
- By saying “yes” to that social event, what is it that you will have to say “no” to and if that is peace of mind, some time out, is it worth it on the energy scale?
- What would happen if you stopped telling people how busy you are? How do you think they would respond? How would it make you feel? Is it a label to let go of?
- What does a less busy life look like for you?
Maybe, before you tell everyone how busy you are, have a think about whether this is your own doing? Perhaps you could change the narrative or actually not say anything at all?
Maybe saying to someone “sorry I haven’t called, when can we get something in the diary to catch up properly?” Could that be enough?
Like everything, it’s all about balance and choices and the only person that can change that is you.
If you don’t want to be busy……don’t be!
